Last week we’ve written this whole article about the first steps into nudism for women. With the whole cultural background thing it is a fact that these steps are often considered more difficult to make if you’re a woman, but men have their issues too. Yes, in highschool we did shower together with twenty of other teenagers, but those days are long gone. For years and years we’ve rarely seen another human being naked if it wasn’t our partner and now we have some doubts. Our bodies aren’t as tight as they used to be, our muscles sank in this comfortable layer of what we like to call “the good life” and then there’s that other part…
Let’s start with some penis talk.
Let’s start with some penis talk.
1. Is my penis large enough?
So few will admit it and yet so many who worry about this. We like to call “him” our manhood and the larger he is, the more manly we are, right? So the last thing we want to happen is to be the guy with the smallest penis.
Well… All of that manhood stuff is pure bulls… (sorry, we’re in the USA at the moment, we can’t say those words out loud anymore). The size of your penis does not make you more manly, does not make you a better lover and does not make you more sexually attractive. At least not at a nudist place.
We’ve really seen all shapes and sizes and chances are really really low that we haven’t seen several that were pretty similar to yours.
Well… All of that manhood stuff is pure bulls… (sorry, we’re in the USA at the moment, we can’t say those words out loud anymore). The size of your penis does not make you more manly, does not make you a better lover and does not make you more sexually attractive. At least not at a nudist place.
We’ve really seen all shapes and sizes and chances are really really low that we haven’t seen several that were pretty similar to yours.
2. What if I get an erection?
This might be the most discussed topic when it comes to male nudism, what do you do when things start to go up? Opinions about this differ, some say that it’s sexual and that you have to hide it, others say that it’s a natural thing and nothing to be ashamed about. There’s no right or wrong here, it all depends on how the persons around you think about the subject. So let’s go for the general consensus among nudies.
First of all, getting an erection at nudist places is very rare. We’ve seen thousands of male nudists in our lives and only a handful of upward going penises. So don’t worry too much about it. If it does happen, turn on your stomagh, cover up with a towel or get into the swimming pool. You could also pretend that nothing happened, but do realise that it might be interpreted wrongly.
First of all, getting an erection at nudist places is very rare. We’ve seen thousands of male nudists in our lives and only a handful of upward going penises. So don’t worry too much about it. If it does happen, turn on your stomagh, cover up with a towel or get into the swimming pool. You could also pretend that nothing happened, but do realise that it might be interpreted wrongly.
3. Can you come as a single?
Enough penis talk but yet another difficult subject.
Many nudist venues are not very keen about receiving single men. This might seem pretty discriminating and in fact it is, but single men have two major disadvantages. One is that there are many more single men interested in nudism than single women and those places like to keep a male/female balance to keep things comfortable for everyone. The second reason is that if bad things happen, they’re most likely to be caused by single males. So a negative stereotype has been created over the years which is hard to get rid of.
Our best tip: Don’t e-mail the place you want to visit, but give them a call. Explain your situation, answer their questions and you may be much more likely to get accepted.
Many nudist venues are not very keen about receiving single men. This might seem pretty discriminating and in fact it is, but single men have two major disadvantages. One is that there are many more single men interested in nudism than single women and those places like to keep a male/female balance to keep things comfortable for everyone. The second reason is that if bad things happen, they’re most likely to be caused by single males. So a negative stereotype has been created over the years which is hard to get rid of.
Our best tip: Don’t e-mail the place you want to visit, but give them a call. Explain your situation, answer their questions and you may be much more likely to get accepted.
4. How to behave as a single male
We know that also this is discriminating and that many nudists will be furious because we’re writing this, but it’s the truth. As a single male it’s better to watch your steps a little bit. Don’t get all paranoid, it’s not like the whole place will see you as a pervert, but keep a couple of things in mind. For example, don’t place yourself in between women, try to get to meet the other men first. And certainly don’t place yourself in between the children!
Although what you’re about to say may be 100% genuine, try not to complement women too much about their looks as this can be easily interpreted wrongly. And most importantly (but maybe also the most difficult), act normal! Don’t go sitting in a faraway corner because you don’t want to disturb anyone else, but try to engage in conversations. Try to make friends, but focus on the other men first.
Oh and another good tip: In volleyball it’s common to give your partner a smack on the butt if he or she scored a goal. If it’s not your wife, don’t do so.
Although what you’re about to say may be 100% genuine, try not to complement women too much about their looks as this can be easily interpreted wrongly. And most importantly (but maybe also the most difficult), act normal! Don’t go sitting in a faraway corner because you don’t want to disturb anyone else, but try to engage in conversations. Try to make friends, but focus on the other men first.
Oh and another good tip: In volleyball it’s common to give your partner a smack on the butt if he or she scored a goal. If it’s not your wife, don’t do so.
5. Where to go?
Because of this whole single male issue and the quotas that nudist venues often use to maintain a balance, your best chances are at the bigger places. In our experience, most of the very large campgrounds and resorts always have enough guests to somehow keep some balance and they rarely bother about a man more or less.
Another option is of course the public places. On nude beaches for example, nobody is in charge or will tell you that you’re not welcome. On the other hand, unless you’re a very social being, on public places it’s much harder to make friends.
Another option is of course the public places. On nude beaches for example, nobody is in charge or will tell you that you’re not welcome. On the other hand, unless you’re a very social being, on public places it’s much harder to make friends.
6. Join the club
We’re not the biggest fans of nudist federations and clubs, but we believe that for the single man they do have some advantages. Being a member means that the club or federation has already met you or at least knows who you are. The membership card is like an ace during poker. It doesn’t mean you’ll get into all nudist places, but it’ll certainly give you an advantage over those who are not members. Also, pick an active club. Some clubs are just there taking your money and giving you a card while others do their very best to organise activities to bring people together. Pick one of the latter and you’ll soon have a lot of new nudie friends.
7. Take one friend
Again, there’s that stereotype and although we surely don’t agree, we do want to give you some tips to work with it. Yes, if you’re coming with a friend, many of the others may think you’re gay. But so what? You’re not here to find a one night stand, are you? (if you are, nudist places are not the best hunting ground, we can tell you that). Others will be much more likely to strike up a conversation when it’s the two of you and even if they wouldn’t, at least you’ll have someone to share the experience with. But don’t come as a group. Single men may be sometimes frowned upon, groups of single men are even less accepted.
8. Don’t surprise your partner
It’s a common misunderstanding that single male nudists don’t have a relationship. It does happen that their wife or girlfriend is not interested. Neither is she in football or in getting wasted at the local bar, but that’s never an issue. When she’s not interested in nudism, this means that you’ll have to go as a single man. You can try to convince her, you can try to make her read all articles and magazines and websites about nudism you can ever find, but sometimes she just doesn’t want to take the step.
In such a case, don’t, and we repeat, DON’T drag her into it as a surprise! This is not a joke. The chances that she’ll say “oh, well, we’re here now, let’s give it a shot” are very very low. There may be tears, there may be shouting, there may be stuff thrown to your head and if you’re really unlucky you’ll have the divorce papers tomorrow. Trust us, surprising someone into nudism is similar to getting a face tattoo when you’re drunk. It rarely works out well.
In such a case, don’t, and we repeat, DON’T drag her into it as a surprise! This is not a joke. The chances that she’ll say “oh, well, we’re here now, let’s give it a shot” are very very low. There may be tears, there may be shouting, there may be stuff thrown to your head and if you’re really unlucky you’ll have the divorce papers tomorrow. Trust us, surprising someone into nudism is similar to getting a face tattoo when you’re drunk. It rarely works out well.
9. Towel, sunscreen and a good book
Yep, we’ve mentioned this one in last week’s article as well and we’re mentioning it again just because it’s sooooo important! When you’re at a nudist place, you always have to sit on a towel. And yes, as a first timer you will forget about this, but as soon as you notice, please correct yourself.
We weren’t going to talk about penises again, so let’s just tell you this: An overdone sausage doesn’t ruin a BBQ, but it will certainly ruin yours. Especially if it’s your sausage. The same thing counts for those hams, by the way.
And a good book, we’re still huge fans of reading at a nudist place instead of looking at cats and kids on Facebook or checking out the latest football stats. They’ll still be there when you get home, don’t worry.
We weren’t going to talk about penises again, so let’s just tell you this: An overdone sausage doesn’t ruin a BBQ, but it will certainly ruin yours. Especially if it’s your sausage. The same thing counts for those hams, by the way.
And a good book, we’re still huge fans of reading at a nudist place instead of looking at cats and kids on Facebook or checking out the latest football stats. They’ll still be there when you get home, don’t worry.
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Try replacing “single male” with a race of your choosing. See if you notice how absurd this all sounds. “As a [black person], it is better to watch your steps a little bit. Try not to compliment the [Mexican’s] on their looks. Make friends with the other Asians before you approach a white person. See, doesn’t that sound ridiculous?
Instead of telling single men how to act so as to avoid making others uncomfortable with their discriminatory views, you work to dispel the stereotype that single men are perverts and have to act a certain way to be welcomed.
You’re 100% right, it’s pure discrimination. But that doesn’t take away the fact that it’s there and the tips we’re giving can help to avoid it. We believe that with our website we’re working hard on normalising nudity, both for men and women and we’ll keep doing so.
100% with you on this topic, Nick & Lin. Being a member of your naturist federation helps sometimes when going to foreign clubs that may have a no single man policy as well. It could be a great way to get involved in your federation or club activity, so you can practice your nudism as a real useful hobby. On the take one friend, you allude to the fact it could be a male friend. However, it could be a female friend. Yes, I know that people may think it’s unrealistic to practice nudism with a female friend when you significant other is not joining, but it’s an option to consider. Particularly if you are active in your club/federation. Keep up the great work! I love what you guys are doing!
I thought this was a great pair of articles. Well done for being honest and practical in your advice.
This article might have been better titled Tips for the First Time Straight Male Nudie. Gay male nudies don’t worry what people will think about our sexual orientation if we show up with a friend of any gender. We also don’t have to be concerned about balancing genders. This article felt a little heterosexist to me.
We’re sorry to hear that Steve and you’re right, the article was mainly focused on straight men. Although gay men often have a lot of problems getting into non-gay resorts because they are seen as two single men rather than a couple.
Maybe we should write another 9 tips article for the first time gay man or woman too.
Good on you for righting about nudism. And what can be done once naked
What about opinions regarding penis rings? I know this is a male subject, and often discussed among both genders. I personally am one of those that likes to wear them, and i dont find it sexually. I like my accessories be it nose piercing, ear piercings amongst others. Personally to me its more like a tattoo. A way to express yourself. Its common to see males wearing penis rings at my local nudist beach and everyone there is fine with it. Both when i first went as a single male and later with my nudist girlfriend. Whats your thoughts on the subject?
Ha… that’s a difficult subject. Because there’s no right or wrong. We’ve met several people like you who wear genital jewellery just because they like it, they think it looks nice and it has no sexual influence on them at all. On the other hand, we’ve met swingers who claim that certain jewellery are a subtle hint that they like the swinging thing.
The same with tattoos, lots of people have them these days. In all different kinds and sizes. We have a personal friend who has a naked lady in a cocktail glass tattooed on his chest just because he likes the image. But then we heard stories (we haven’t seen it in real life) about men having arrows on their belly pointing towards their penis.
We understand that for nudist places the easy way is just to ban tattoos and jewellery. Then they don’t get into discussions about which tattoo or piercing is allowed and which isn’t. But that will get more difficult by the time as more and more men and women have tattoos and piercings.
On the other hand, there is a stigma on single men. We can talk about this all night and most of tomorrow, but it’s there and it’s not going to leave soon. So our tip for single men is to try to be a bit low profile. And that’s not easy with genital piercings.
We regret this and so do many others, but unfortunately that’s reality today…
Nobody I know smacks butts in volleyball. Not ever.
I’ve been a nudist since I was 21, the first time I went I brought my girlfriend with me.
She soon broke up with me on a unrelated issue.
I’m 25 now and have been visiting nudist resorts on and off.
It’s not the same, I feel out of place. I appreciate the older guys welcoming me but I’m missing that genuine connection I had with my girlfriend.
There is a constant aurora of awkwardness around me being single. I’m a fairly attractive guy.
I talk to people when I can but
I feel empty.
Perhaps it’s my medication or is it me. I’ve lost that luster of enjoyment in my life. I’ve decided to stop going to resorts alone for that reason.
The stigma of a single male is real. I’m a decent, respectable guy but the awkwardness, emptiness and sense of being out of place has become so overwhelming that I’ve decided to stop attending a resort solo.
Hi! Thanks for sharing your story and we’re very sorry to hear about your experiences as a single man.
There’s one important thing you have to remember: You are not the problem. You’re an unfortunate victim of bad behaviour of others before you.
The reason why supporters of European soccer teams are often not allowed anymore to drink beer in the stadium is not because they will all misbehave, but because some rotten apples before them misbehaved. It’s kind of the same thing.
The best tip we can give you is to join a local nudist club, if there are any. Especially a non-landed club (which is not linked directly to a resort) is a good idea. Not only is it easier to make friends when you’re part of a club, you’ll also get the chance to visit several resorts or other activities with them.
Hope this helps!
I am a full time nudist with my nude teen children and husband inside my home. There exists a discrimination for single males in some naturist areas that I witnessed when I visited there with my son. Also attitude of nudist adults towards the teen aged boys is not same as with teen age girls because of them sometimes become boner .
My suggestion is to change these two attitudes as early as possible by all nudists .
I dont get the weird anti-American comments.
How is this even related to race. We have been to nudist resorts and free beaches all over the world. And have never seen even a hint of racism. But we have seen many single males whos behavior was totally unacceptable. Im talking overt perving. Masturbation and stalking. These behaviors are usually at free beaches. We have no problem telling these creeps to go away. I have never seen a single male confront a beach masturbator. It always is a partnered male that does. If single males want the stereotype to change be proactive. Do something to fix the perception. Complaining on forums isnt going to change the situation. No doubt having an opinion will earn some scorn. We are not anti single male. We have a few regular friends we see at the local nude beach who come sit with us. We dont let bad behavior ruin our day or stop social interaction. But standing close penis in Hand wont get you any invites.
That is excellent advice! Thank you so much for that. You are absolutely right, if single men would stand up against perverts it might change the whole perception. We’re planning to write a blog post about the “single male problem” and certainly add this as well!
Good advice, i enjoy nudism solo. My family doesn’t care to participate and i don’t care to go to a resort. Therefore i practice nudism at home in my pool or back yard. It’d be nice if there were a non landed group in my area. It’d be nice to meet a few friends to enjoy this life style with. I often wonder what it’s like to go to a gay resort where the equality numbers would not exist. I have found a resort is what you make it. Yes the swingers are there. So is the average joe who is just enjoys not dealing with the combersome of clothing. Most people aren’t there to hook up. They are there to relax and meet with freinds. I used to attend a local nude car show annually. It was like a family reunion, it’s been years since I’ve lived in the area.
If there’s one thing we’ve learned during our discoveries of nudism, it’s that there are as many forms of nudism as there are nudists. In the end, it’s all about what you enjoy the most.
Have any tips for people with disabilities?
Being a single guy with mobility, hearing and vision issues I have shied away from trying this on my own.
Hi,
We wrote a blog post about this a while ago: https://www.nakedwanderings.com/naturism-with-a-disability/
It’s not really tips but mostly impressions, but it does contain a link to a MeWe group for naturists with disabilities which might be a good help for you.
I was having a browse around your blog and found this post. It was interesting that you started by mentioning penises in a post about tips for first time naturist men.
Let’s be honest, the only difference on a beach between a clothed man (in shorts, swimming trunks or thong) and a naked man, is the penis being hidden or not. Having your penis exposed to the elements is extremely pleasant. It is a very sensitive organ obviously.
I’ll be honest, before I became a nudie, from around 14 year old I used to wear the smallest swimming trunks I could. They barely covered my penis and could only just hold it in. In fact, they were so low cut that if my penis got a little bit of growth it caused there to be a wide gap between the top of the trunks and my body, and anyone standing close could look down and see it. My point being, that those skimpy trunks which barely covered it, were the only difference between being nude and not being nude. I was lucky to be endowed with an above average sized penis, not huge, but an inch and a half more than what is considered the upper end of average. I was never comfortable having it squashed into tight underwear (the reason I havent worn underwear for decades) or swimming trunks, and found that letting it free was a great feeling. To this day, that’s what defines being nude to me. It’s not about showing it off to others, I just love the feeling of having my penis free to feel the elements and not having to worry about anyone seeing it.
Regarding erections, my advice is, don’t go blatently parading around in front of others (strangers) with one, especially women you don’t know. But they are natural and I don’t feel the need to hide it either. On the occasions that I’ve had them at the beach I’ve just carried on as normal but not set out to advertise it. When I’ve had one while accompanied by women, such as a girfriend and her daughter, it was never an issue, they weren’t bothered about it and rarely mentioned it.
I have been both a single male nudist several times and part of a male female nudist couple, also several times. We only ever went to beaches, not resorts or clubs, but I never felt (or feel) awkward or discriminated against as a single male.
Something I saw mentioned in one earlier comment is genital piercings. I have one, the purpose of which had nothing to do with nudism/naturism, it was requested by a female partner as an enhancement during sex. It’s a frenum piercing with a large enough ring that the ring can be worn around the shaft of the penis like a collar behind the glans. However, it can work its way off and dangle from the pierced skin. They do draw looks and occasionally questions, mostly “Did it hurt?”.