When chatting with naturists, nudists, or anyone we meet without clothes, one regret echoes universally: “I wish I had discovered this sooner in my life.” You can see in their eyes how much they wish they could turn back time and spend those previous decades enjoying nude beaches or clothes-free resorts.
Digging deeper into why it took them so long to finally take that first step, we hear the same reasons repeatedly. “I didn’t know about it” is one we’ve been trying to solve throughout our 8 years running this blog. “Kids” is a major one, followed by “no time for something new,” the classic “partner who doesn’t want to hear anything about it,” and “I don’t know anyone else who does it.” The list goes on and on.
All valid reasons, but they all seem to lead back to one powerful emotion: Fear.
Fear of Being Vulnerable
Whether we like it or not, our society places immense pressure on appearance. Unrealistic beauty standards constantly push us to be more, better, different. Mostly different, actually, because if you step back and look at the bigger picture, these standards are constantly shifting. It’s a vicious circle perpetuated by industries whose business model depends on making people feel inadequate. Fashion, cosmetics, plastic surgery, just to name a few.
We’re sold artificial layers supposedly making us more beautiful and attractive, so it feels incredibly intimidating to remove these layers in front of others. It makes you feel vulnerable, even emotionally exposed.
The crucial realization is that this isn’t just you. These societal norms affect everyone. Even those seemingly confident nude bodies you see in media have struggled or often are still struggling with these same insecurities.
In our experience, that feeling of vulnerability evaporates when everyone is in the same state. Naked. We often use the example of that classic nightmare where you’re giving a presentation and suddenly realize you’re naked. In that nightmare, the audience is always clothed. If they were naked too, it probably wouldn’t be such a big deal.
Fear of Ending Up in an Orgy
In our society, nudity and sex are tightly intertwined. This connection exists worldwide. We can’t think of a single culture or religion that has ever separated the two. And we’re bombarded with this association from multiple directions. When nudity appears in movies, it’s typically related to sex. Even when it isn’t directly sexual, it’s generally obvious that it’s for marketing purposes. Nude scenes attract audiences, every Hollywood marketer knows this very well. Even in commercials, we’ve yet to see a shower gel ad featuring a slightly overweight grandma.
It can be hard to imagine that nudity and sex can be completely unrelated. This was, in fact, one of our biggest fears when we took our first steps into social nudity. What if the whole “non-sexual” thing is just a cover? What if, as soon as we walk in, we’ll find ourselves in the middle of a huge orgy?
Well, we can assure you this won’t be the case. But we weren’t there to tell ourselves that back when we started. One thing we realized at that moment was that we could always turn back. We’re free people, if we walk through that door and don’t like what we see, we can always turn around and leave. But guess what? We didn’t turn around.
Fear of Physical Reactions
Hopefully, the previous section explained the concept of non-sexual social nudity, but that doesn’t mean you can’t experience physical arousal in a non-sexual setting. These things happen. You’re in the supermarket picking up cereal, an attractive person walks by, and suddenly your mind couldn’t care less about tomorrow’s breakfast. You feel that energy moving through your body. Especially for men, in quite a visible way.
Involuntary physical reactions may happen, but they’re surprisingly rare. Places where non-sexual social nudity is the norm have their own unique atmosphere that seems to discourage your mind and body from wandering into inappropriate territory. It’s difficult to explain, you really need to experience it yourself to truly understand.
This isn’t just an issue for men, by the way. Women are equally concerned about becoming aroused at inappropriate moments and about what to do when it happens to a nearby man. Etiquette-wise, these situations are supposed to be handled with discretion. It’s not a catastrophe or something to be ashamed of, just move away, lie on your stomach, or jump into the pool and wait until things return to normal.
Fear of Harassment
We covered body shaming earlier, but what about unwanted advances or worse? Sexual assault is a serious issue that unfortunately occurs far too often in our world. By removing your clothes, the only barrier between your body and the outside world, aren’t you sending an open invitation?
It’s crucial to remember that you’re going naked for yourself, not to entertain or please others. But of course, simply knowing or saying this won’t necessarily stop someone with bad intentions. If you’re concerned about harassment, our best advice is to visit a private venue like a resort or club that carefully screens who enters.
Nude beaches are different because they’re accessible to everyone. While cases of actual sexual assault are rare, other forms of harassment like staring or inappropriate comments are more common. The best strategy is to position yourself near other naturists. If something happens, they’ll likely intervene, and nobody wants to mess with a naked mob.
Fear of Doing Something Wrong
This was another of our biggest fears. You’re taking this monumental step into the unknown, way outside your comfort zone, and even if you’ve read our first-time nudist guide, you still don’t have all the answers. What if you do something wrong? What if you behave inappropriately? What if you’ve completely misunderstood the situation? What if you trip and accidentally give everyone the full moon combined with a downward-facing dog?
Look, we don’t know who you are or what you’re capable of, but if you’re anything like us, you’ll probably make mistakes. At some point, someone might gently mention that you shouldn’t sit with your naked bottom directly on the furniture. You might forget to apply sunscreen to certain body parts (definitely not recommended), or you might accidentally give your neighbour the full moon. If you manage to combine it with a downward-facing dog, do let us know. But no pictures necessary, thanks!
These things happen to everyone. Yes, it can be embarrassing, but once again, we’ve all been through it. Even that couple who look like they haven’t worn clothes for thirty years, they’ve given someone the full moon at some point. Probably even downward-facing-dogged them too.
Fear of Doing Something Wrong – Part 2
Beyond physical mishaps, many fear doing something wrong on a much deeper level: doing something that isn’t culturally accepted. The fear of being labelled. The fear of negative reactions. The fear of receiving party invitations with “please wear clothes” handwritten on every one from now on.
How you navigate your relationship with culture or religion is entirely up to you, this is not something we want to interfere with. Just know that it’s highly likely (as in 99.9%) that there are others who share your same beliefs have chosen to embrace social nudity.
It’s also completely your choice whom you tell and whom you don’t. We’ve chosen to be very open about it, but you don’t have to be if you’re not comfortable. For the first two years of visiting nude beaches and nudist resorts, we told absolutely nobody. Then we shared with some close friends. Eventually, we started this blog and appeared in newspapers, and suddenly everyone knew. We haven’t regretted this openness for a moment, but even after all these years, we still occasionally hear “You are going to wear clothes, right?” It’s a tired joke we’ve heard hundreds of times. But it doesn’t make us uncomfortable anymore, it only reveals the discomfort of those saying it.
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Well written. Some of the things had me chuckling, but the humorous parts were just a way of explaining real life concerns.
What you could add to this is list is the fear of family and friends discovering that you are a naturist.You may not want them to know and trying to explain why you like going to the same place for holiday each year which just happens to have a naturist beach could be awkward (I’m waiting for someone to ask why we have gone to Maspalomas for the last three years and are going again this year).
True. We thought we had this somewhat covered in the “Fear of Doing Something Wrong – Part 2” section, but could have been a bit more specific because it is a common fear
Good instructions for beginners. Encouraging advice for everyone.
I think I’ve always been a naturist in my own way. I’ve only been a social naturist for 20 years. I haven’t really talked about it, nor have I hidden it. I’ve also found it on Google. I’ve also had a few supporting roles on television.
I’ve rarely seen inappropriate behavior at naturist camping. I think you can roll over a little in the shower and when setting up the tent so that “something” is visible?